Greatest Horror Movies

Ringu - What Film Should I Watch

1. The Shining
It’s No.1 because it’s not only the greatest horror movie, but arguably the greatest movie ever created. If you’ve not seen it, get the f%ck off my site you visually illiterate f&ck, (I’m aware of the irony of me calling anyone illiterate).


2. Jaws
Can you think of a movies that has infulenced human behaviour more than Jaws? It was a retotical question…. of coarse you can’t! Every time i go swiming in the sea, I always think there is a chance that a f^ck off sized shark is going to rip me a new assh*le! Jaws is a movie you can watch over and over again and never get bored.


3. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
It’s great to get a Grindhouse movie on our list. Despite what you might think, most people forget to put “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” on their top 10 greatest horror movies lists. This movie is perfect to watch with a group of friends. I love,(….love might be a bad choice of words) when Leather Face picks the girl up casually and places her fighting body on the hanging meat hook. The whole process seems as natural to him as making a cup of tea, for his creepy, creepy family. I’ve not included two on my list but it’s arguably the greatest horror movie sequel, (besides Halloween 2, maybe).


4. Halloween
Michael Myers, (not to be confused with Mike Myers, the comedian, film maker who tries to beat Policy Academy, for the number of sequel under his belt), is one of horror movies all time greatest villains. He walks absolutely everywhere, and why would he ever run? He knows where you are going to be before you do. They say the closest distance between two points is a straight line. No one knows this better than the psychopath Michael Myers.


5. Psycho
The twist in this movie is truly great, and the superb dialogue from Norman Bates makes this a masterpiece. When he says, “A Boys Best Friend Is His Mother”, we all shiver a little.

6. Ringu
We all love The Ring, cause young girls in horror movies are f&cking creepy. Even that sh£t movie “Tommy Knockers”, or “Children of the Korn”, whatever it’s called, the children in it were creepy.

7. The Exorcist
The power of Christ compels you… to watch this epic movie.

8. Poltergeist
I like the fact that the parents in the movie get stoned on a Saturday night when the kids are in bed. In the directors cut, it turns out that it was all just from the husbands imagination, as he was constantly stoned and paranoid as f*ck!

9. The Thing
I can’t speak highly enough about this movie. I’m going to watch this movie tonight, (it being Halloween). The old version is okay, the new one is a piece of sh&t but the middle one is f&cking amazing! It was always gong to make our top 10 greatest horror movies list.


10. Alien
Everyone loves Alien cause it’s scary as sh*t. I hate the things in the movie that stick to your face. I used get nightmares from them when I was younger. I hate to say it, as Aliens is a great movie, but it’s no Alien.

Honourary Mentions
Dawn of the Dead
Hourary mentions
Night of The Living dead
Zombie 2
The Omen
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2
Rosenary’s Baby
Don’t Look Now
The Abominable Dr. Phibes

13 thoughts on “Greatest Horror Movies

  1. I actually love the idea that Poltergeist could be read as a movie about a paranoid marijuana experience. Need to watch it again!

  2. I could see it being a paranoid experience of some other drug, but marijuana? Seriously dude? Have you ever even had an experience with marijuana? Because it does not get you that high. Your comment is kind of stupid.

    1. Thanks for the comment Jes.

      I guess we’re not all experts like you when it comes to drugs that cause paranoia. You seem to be an expert on the topic of hallucinogens and the effect they have on homo sapiens.

      So marijuana has no tendency to cause paranoia?

      It’s so great to get the opinion of an Apothecarist on my site.

      Do visit again, I feel like we’ve all learnt so much Jes!

  3. Poltergeist could be read as a movie about a paranoid delusion brought on by a dissociative psychedelic drug, though. That thought is kind of interesting.

  4. I think the idea of poltergeist being a paranoid delusion needs more evidence to back it up. What in the movie makes you say that? I found nothing online alluding to an alternate ending.

  5. Pretty ignorant that you tell people to get off your site because they haven’t seen a movie
    One of the main reasons I was, was because I hadn’t seen a lot of classics.
    You lost my traffic and hopefully some more
    Stay classy

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